It feels like I do not belong.
Along this path, most take
one must first die.
Must hunger for death
they are well-dressed coffins
groomed and slick
It seems inside matters not.

It’s all a battle
fight to get to the top
vultures battling for position
around a carcass
I try but belong I do not
Kindness strange
Love, a lack of vision and purpose
even You have become a goal and task
They flock and land
Picking bones with little meat
fly away victoriously
I don’t have wings nor the hunger
I can not see I can not be
not like this not this way
Still, I stay, I try and play
this gain game

The hold, hold, till knuckles turn white
clenched fist that can hold and swing
gather, gather, gatherings
teachings, breath, quiet, meditation, techniques
All to be more efficient, better at holding, gathering
How to build castles out the bones you collect
I do not know what it is
but it infects, spreads
I want to be sick
I want their wings

My soul knows another song
The words I have yet to find
inside with time I will
But for now, I am
A bird on a tree chirping a song
A little afraid my humming might give me away
I might be their pray
I know I can not stay
My own wings and way, I must find
It’s this song inside
I can no longer hide.

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